Sunday, June 19, 2011

Father's Day 2011

Normally, in the past, I have really dreaded this day. It's not been an easy "holiday" for me the majority of my adult life. This year was different. I'm very glad about that. I didn't find myself standing in the card section looking for a very blank, basic Father's Day card of sorts that I could just sign my name to. All together, it was a much more pleasant experience.

Growing up in my house wasn't horrible by any stretch of the imagination, it was just a childhood with mostly good memories but not a lot of close bonding going on. My dad had just become a dentist when I was born. He was constantly working to build a practice (so it seemed) and my mom was always just there doing what she had to do. This wasn't anything I realized until I was older. It was just normal to me. There was a time in my life when I really resented my childhood, even though I had everything a little girl could ask for. The one thing I missed out on was a truly loving home. Looking back at it now, I realize that life is what you make it.

I could go on and on about how my parents were distant and focused on their own problems more than the kids. Now that I am a parent, especially of teenagers - a whole other breed - I realize that my parents did what they could just to survive. I have worked past the hostility and frustration to a place of peace. It helps a lot that my dad and I are closer than we've ever been. I honestly chalk that all up to the fact that he is now retired and doesn't have the burdens of owning a dental practice on his shoulders. He only needs to be concerned about his own bills. Anger and bitterness only make you sick. The past is the past. Move on and live the life God intended you to live.

My dad gave his children what he did not have growing up. He came from a more difficult environment than I could ever imagine. I respect him for working as hard as he did to make sure that his children never had to go without. This Father's Day I was able to look forward to calling my dad and telling him "Happy Father's Day" without feeling like I was doing it out of obligation. I love you dad. From the bottom of my heart up.
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