Sunday, September 12, 2010

What's in a dream?

When I was young, like elementary school age, I would have terrifying nightmares. The first real memories I have of these bad dreams was right after my granddaddy died. He passed away very suddenly the day before my 11th birthday, July 26, 1978. I was very close to him but didn't cry when he died. I was young but knew I should be crying. I watched my mom and my Maye Maye (grandmother) cry but I just didn't. I couldn't.

I had to postpone my birthday party because of the funeral. When I was finally able to have my friends over, they wanted to do a seance to call the spirit of my granddaddy. I didn't believe in any of that. It was something we were taught was evil and of the devil. But that night, it was raining. In our den was this humongous Mexican chandelier. As we were doing whatever we were doing, it started moving....and from what I remember, we heard a knock on the front door. Of course, we all screamed and then ended up going to sleep.

Over the next few months, I would have dreams about my granddaddy. I would always be with my family and usually my Maye Maye was also in the dream. I would always be the only person who could see him. He would come to me and attack me in my dreams. The odd thing was that he was the most gentle man in the world. He never raised his voice to me or laid a hand on me except in comfort and love. There were a series of about four dreams and they would repeat themselves over and over for months. Finally, one day I told my mom about the dreams. She asked me if he had ever hurt me, trying to figure out why I was having these dreams. Once I talked about them they never happened again.

Over the next 10-12 years, I would have horrible nightmares that would wake me up frozen to my bed. I wouldn't be able to move or sometimes even breath. All I knew to do was start singing "Jesus Loves Me" to make the bad feelings go away. The dreams were always demonic in nature. In some of them I would be crying out to God to save me. I would wake up crying or screaming in my sleep. Once I got married they pretty much stopped. Once I had children I didn't have any more, but I have been fascinated with the paranormal ever since I was brave enough to watch those shows on TV.

The other night I had a very bazaar experience that made me think about all of this again. It makes me wonder what's really out there that we can't see. But that's for another blog.
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Saturday, September 4, 2010

Colorado Springs and the USOC

With my job, I don't get to travel as much as I once thought I was going to. i have gone to a few places I wouldn't have gone to though, and that's always nice. This summer, our entire department was taken to Colorado Spring, CO, and visited the USOC and some past and future Olympic athelets. I didn't know what to expect having never been there. A few of the people in our group had been and told lots of great stories so I was excited about going. Heck, I was just excited about going anywhere outside of the state of Texas and on someone else's dime.

We landed on Monday, June 21. Some people went early to get in a weekend before the meeting so they were there to greet us at the hotel. i am just always amazed at the beauty of mountains. I had been to CS a very long time ago in a past life. I knew this time would be much more fun with much bettter memories. There always seems to be that rush to your room because you get there moments before there is a meet and greet. This department as a whole has only been together a year and we had people from all over, Texas, Virginia, Memphis, Singapore and the UK, all together in one room for one purpose - to be a team and see how we could work better together.

Prior to the meeting, we took a test online call the Myers-Briggs Indicator. This is something that I find very interesting. It will basically tell you how your brain works, your strengths and your weaknesses and how those around you work. I was not very surprised at all at the outcome of my answers. The first afternoon, we spent going over the results and learning about ourselves and those around us. For your information, I am ISFJ at work but ESFP at home. I have dual rolls so I react to these circumstances differently.

That evening we were shuttled to the USOC for a small tour of the campus, dinner, meeting a few athletes and then the passing of the torch and lighting of the cauldron. This was actually really cool as we all got to touch and pass the actual torch that the olympians use when they are running to light the cauldron. There was a photograher following us around the whole time and now we have a video of us holding and pass the torch. Pretty cool.

The next day was the only full day we were spending in Colorado so it was definitely full of fun, fun.....meetings. Yes. It's necessary to go over all those statistics about our department and what we can do better. Luckily, it was broken up with another trip to the USOC, cute athletes and a trip to Garden of the Gods. The weather, unlike Texas, was just perfect during the day and a little chilly at night. We did a lot of walking around and exploring and taking pictures. Just being outside in the mountains is not something we do ever in Texas, so we took full advantage of the opportunity! That night we had a wonderful dinner at the country club near there and saw an Indian family perform their dances. It was really nice.

People kept talking about the altitude change and how it can affect you. I didn't feel it except at night when I tried to lay down to sleep. I didn't sleep well either night because it felt like I could breathe very deep. I realized later, well the next day to be exact, that I was experiencing some altitude sickness and was very ready to get home. Thankfully we just had a brief morning meeting and then we were taken to the airport to meet our 3:00 flight back to Texas. I could have stayed longer, but short is always nice too. Living out of a suitcase is not something I would ever want to do on a regular basis.

There are two places that I would live in this universe, other than Texas - Colorado Springs and Amsterdam. For now, I will be staying in Texas, but I would love to have a second home one day.
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Wednesday, September 1, 2010

And I took a couple of months off

It's been a little over two months since I've blogged. It's not like I haven't had anything going on, I just have had the opportunity to blog. They blocked the site at work, which is silly because we can still get on a lot of other sites, like Facebook. I would only blog during lunch and now I can't even do that. By the time I get home, I am either too tired to think or have to work my second job. I am determined to blog at least once a week though. I just have to. It's good for the soul. Oh, plus my computer was on the fritz for a little bit, so that didn't help matters any at all.


(Warning: This is a little bit of a repeat) Over the summer, the kids went on a Mission Trip to San Antonio to help with church renovations there. It was nice just to be home with me and Jonathan and not have to do the whole teenager "I have to go 50 places" thing. We both missed them at first, but got used to it and were then ready for them to come home. They each seemed very changed by the experience and made new friends in the process. Since we have had this new pastor and a lot of his congregation has come over from his last church, it's been a real adjustment for the youth. This experience truly brought them so much closer together. I would even consider going next year if I can manage the days off.

After the Mission Trip, Alyssa and Benjamin went to youth camp - Newbreed. Apparently, this was the last year they were having it (or is next year the last year? I forget). Anyway, I was so glad they were there together. It seemed to have been a wonderful experience for both of them. Getting closer to God and finding out exactly who you are in Him is always a good thing. I went up there, like usual, on Thursday night, to sit through their evening worship meeting. It's always so good and so lively. There are times I miss going to a church like that, but I know the place I am is where God wants the whole family to be. We have beautiful, wonderful relationships.

Michael spent the week after they got back traveling to the Cornerstone Festival with the band, Mouth of the South. They went o Bushnell, Illinois, and from what I could tell and the pictures I saw, they had an amazing time. It was very much a Woodstock type of gathering. I didn't hear from Michael at all, except a curteousy text saying that they had arrived at their destination. That is until Friday. He called to tell me that he had ripped his pants and wanted to know if I could sew them up. To hear him tell me how it happened was just priceless. Something about rockin' out really hard and then jumping caused his pants to rip from the crotch to the knee. I assured him I could get new pants but wasn't even going to try to sew up an old pair of jeans that had been cut off to long short. No.

Gosh. And that was only June!
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